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avatar Jacob Junior
Ladies, if he
-is hot
-always smells good
-makes your mouth water
-tastes amazing
-leaves you feeling happier than ever
That’s not your man. That’s garlic bread.

Ladies, if he -is hot -always smells good -makes your mouth water -tastes amazing -leaves you feeling happier than ever That’s not your man. That’s garlic bread.

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avatar John Paul

"At the end of the day, remind yourself that you did the best you could today, and that is good enough."

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avatar Agni Gauss
Me threatening to call ICE on my coworker HIM threatening to call the IRS

Me threatening to call ICE on my coworker HIM threatening to call the IRS

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avatar Anthony Miller
Brisket should be the meat of Thanksgiving, not turkey.

I said what I said.

Brisket should be the meat of Thanksgiving, not turkey. I said what I said.

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avatar Anthony Miller
I know I'm dead when my wife starts doing the thing she asked me to do.

I know I'm dead when my wife starts doing the thing she asked me to do.

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avatar John Paul
Sometimes it takes me all day to get nothing done.

Sometimes it takes me all day to get nothing done.

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