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avatar jojo9
Me: Most dust is human skin flakes therefore roombas are carnivorous robots and one day the dust won't satiate them anymore so they will rise up and devour us all
Therapist: Can we go back to discussing your childhood

Me: Most dust is human skin flakes therefore roombas are carnivorous robots and one day the dust won't satiate them anymore so they will rise up and devour us all Therapist: Can we go back to discussing your childhood

avatar Jacob Junior
SO MANY PEOPLE HAVE INSPIRED ME TO BE NOTHING LIKE THEM.

SO MANY PEOPLE HAVE INSPIRED ME TO BE NOTHING LIKE THEM.

avatar Zoe ZZZ
HOW IT FEELS TO HAVE NOT TOUCHED OR BEEN TOUCHED IN LITERAL YEARS

HOW IT FEELS TO HAVE NOT TOUCHED OR BEEN TOUCHED IN LITERAL YEARS

avatar Zoe ZZZ
I saw on the news today that someone was seen in front of the asylum riding a goat wearing a thong and smoking pot. I'll come to get you, but this is the last time.

I saw on the news today that someone was seen in front of the asylum riding a goat wearing a thong and smoking pot. I'll come to get you, but this is the last time.

avatar Jeremy Jordan
WHEN YOU THOUGHT YOU HIT A DOG BUT IT WAS JUST AN ICE PROTESTER

WHEN YOU THOUGHT YOU HIT A DOG BUT IT WAS JUST AN ICE PROTESTER

avatar Charlie Chocolate
Someone's out there doing this Voodoo on me and needs to STOP.

Someone's out there doing this Voodoo on me and needs to STOP.

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