Matthew Cappucci @MatthewCappucci The lady at the DMV took my picture for the license/registration. Then she asked "body type?" "Um, slim to average... I guess...?" "Of the vehicle." "Oh." *she laughs hysterically for 3 minutes* Now she is telling all her coworkers and I can never show my face here again.
I've got a question. I was in a restaurant yesterday and I, uh, I really had to fart bad. But I noticed the music was loud, so what I did was I, I timed my farts to the beat of the song. And after a while I felt a little better, finished drinking my coffee. But I noticed everybody was staring at me. That's, that's when I realised I had my earbuds i
My 3 year old walked into our living room with company over and started belting out her favorite song using my wife's vibrator as her microphone. This is the single greatest moment of my life.
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