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avatar Joseph Mitchell
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avatar Sophia Rich

I'm genuinely horrified to interview this homeless man. Oh good, you're not jerking off. Good morning America, and today we bring you another episode of what the actual fuck did I just watch? On today's episode, we witness a crackhead who pretends to be homeless in order to collect an easy welfare check. The fuck you mean pretending? I live in the

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avatar Olivia Veqqie

He's done it again, folks. President Trump has made history. He is creating the very first of its kind, a brand new national academy, ala West Point, that some critics, including myself, well, I'm not really a critic, I'm more of a champion of America, are calling this one of the greatest things to secure America's future ever created. I'm going to

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avatar Anthony Miller

Call me home, Rio, God damn. Through the storm and the black, it's in. The sky falls down and the river's on flow. Came my name in the winter snow. Stealing the hand when the long ship sails. Cold in the lungs when the night winds wail. Came from the frost where the brave don't fail. Every storm.

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avatar Olivia Veqqie

A young woman in a red polo shirt, black shorts, and a visor, resembling a Chick-fil-A uniform, dances energetically in a commercial kitchen. Chick-fil-A logos are visible on cups.

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avatar John Paul

People are shit. You understand that? You full of shit. Not being able to speak is not the same as not speaking. You seem as if you like to talk. I like to let people talk who like to talk. It makes it easier to find out how full of shit they are.

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