She goes: Oh honey. I make twenty-eight thousand dollars a month off foster care. And I was like, what? And she was like: Yeah, because I have this many kids. And she goes: Here's the thing. You want to get a D-rate kid. I was like, what is a D-rate kid? She goes: Okay, here's how it works. You want to make sure they fail in school. If they fail in
Cats with ocd. I'm sitting here in the boring room, it's just another rainy Sunday afternoon. I'm wasting my time, I got nothing to do. I'm hanging around, I'm waiting for you, but nothing ever happens. And I wonder... I'm driving around in my car, I'm driving too fast, I'm driving too far. I'd like to change my point of view. I feel so lonely, I'm
Greatest prankcall ever. I'm 45 I'm dating your son. Hello, hi. Hi, I'm looking for George, I'm sorry. He's not here at the moment. Would you like to leave a message? Sure, um, this is Jennifer. Who who is this? This is his mom. Oh my gosh, I'm so excited to meet you. Who are you? Oh, this is weird. He told me, he told me that you were totally cool
Hitting on my wife in public. Excuse me, ma'am, you're not allowed to be in here. What do you mean? There was a sign out front that said 'no snacks inside'. Okay, get out of here. No. I'll give you this last bag if you let me bag your number. Oh my God, no. Even trade. No, I don't want. No. Excuse me, ma'am, have you ever been arrested? Stop. 'Caus
Ignoring him? Let me tell you what you're really doing. You're teaching him how to live without you. Women think, oh, he's suffering, he's missing me, he's waiting for me to come back. But here's the hard truth. You're not breaking him down. You're helping him adjust. If you keep pushing someone away, what do you think they'll do? Sit around crying
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