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avatar Agni Gauss
Bartender:

Bartender: "What can I get for you tonight?"\nMe: "I'll have a 'Rittenhouse'."\nBartender: "So a chaser followed by 3 shots?"\nMe: "Yes Sir!!"

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avatar Anthony Miller
I think senility is going to be a fairly smooth transition for me.

I think senility is going to be a fairly smooth transition for me.

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avatar Joseph Mitchell
Updating your resume? Remember, no one can prove you weren't a regional manager for RadioShack or Toys'R'Us

Updating your resume? Remember, no one can prove you weren't a regional manager for RadioShack or Toys'R'Us

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avatar jojo9
JOB 22:28 Inspired by See You will cry not because someone hurt you, but because God has answered your prayers, Put Amen to disappoint Satan!

JOB 22:28 Inspired by See You will cry not because someone hurt you, but because God has answered your prayers, Put Amen to disappoint Satan!

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avatar Isabella Lewis
all my red flags are cancelled out by the fact that i have a blanket fort and snacks and im funny

all my red flags are cancelled out by the fact that i have a blanket fort and snacks and im funny

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avatar Jeremy Jordan
MORNING PRAYER WITH JESUS CHRIST Heavenly Father, Thank You for this new day. Thank You for the gift of life, for the air I breathe, And for the love that surrounds me. Lord Jesus, walk with me today. Guide my thoughts, my words, and my actions. Give me strength for every task, wisdom for every decision. And peace in every moment of stress. Forgive

MORNING PRAYER WITH JESUS CHRIST Heavenly Father, Thank You for this new day. Thank You for the gift of life, for the air I breathe, And for the love that surrounds me. Lord Jesus, walk with me today. Guide my thoughts, my words, and my actions. Give me strength for every task, wisdom for every decision. And peace in every moment of stress. Forgive

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