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avatar Charlie Chocolate
My daughter made $110 on her lemonade stand today, in like an hour. Turned out people were handing her $5s and $10s and she was just assertively saying thank you for the tip, and not offering change.

My daughter made $110 on her lemonade stand today, in like an hour. Turned out people were handing her $5s and $10s and she was just assertively saying thank you for the tip, and not offering change.

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avatar Agni Gauss
Instead of

Instead of "Single" as a status... I prefer "Independently Owned and Operated"

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avatar Zoe ZZZ
Mommy, what were you doing bouncing on Daddy's stomach last night? I have to do that, or Daddy's belly gets very fat. Bouncing keeps him skinny. That's not going to work. Why not? Because Tina the babysitter keeps blowing him back up again.

Mommy, what were you doing bouncing on Daddy's stomach last night? I have to do that, or Daddy's belly gets very fat. Bouncing keeps him skinny. That's not going to work. Why not? Because Tina the babysitter keeps blowing him back up again.

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avatar Mark Manson
WHO CAN HONESTLY SAY THEY'VE HAD THE SAME PHONE NUMBER FOR THE LAST FIVE YEARS?

WHO CAN HONESTLY SAY THEY'VE HAD THE SAME PHONE NUMBER FOR THE LAST FIVE YEARS?

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avatar Gaie Houston
Sleeping naked will always be a yes for me

Sleeping naked will always be a yes for me

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avatar Joseph Mitchell
Thomas:

Thomas: "Woman, every time you open your mouth, you set our people back decades!"

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