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avatar Joseph Mitchell
I ran twice today. First, I ran out of beer, and then I ran to get some more.

I ran twice today. First, I ran out of beer, and then I ran to get some more.

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avatar Jeremy Jordan
LIFE HAS NO REMOTE. GET UP AND CHANGE IT YOURSELF!

LIFE HAS NO REMOTE. GET UP AND CHANGE IT YOURSELF!

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avatar Olivia Veqqie
James 1:12 Blessed is the person who keeps on going when times are hard. After they have come through hard times, this person will receive a crown. The crown is life itself. The Lord has promised it to those who love him.

James 1:12 Blessed is the person who keeps on going when times are hard. After they have come through hard times, this person will receive a crown. The crown is life itself. The Lord has promised it to those who love him.

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avatar Mark Manson
Wife: Shouldn't you know how a woman's brain works by now? Me: Maybe if your brain worked the same way two days in a row I would. Shouldn't have said that. @BADDADLEROYBROWN

Wife: Shouldn't you know how a woman's brain works by now? Me: Maybe if your brain worked the same way two days in a row I would. Shouldn't have said that. @BADDADLEROYBROWN

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avatar Anthony Miller
We're all against you. F*ck y'all.

We're all against you. F*ck y'all.

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avatar Isabella Lewis
That look you get when you meet the illegals you've been supporting.

That look you get when you meet the illegals you've been supporting.

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