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avatar John Paul
I'm seeing things

I'm seeing things

avatar John Paul

Stop wearing tight socks to bed. You choke your blood flow all night and wonder why your legs feel dead in the morning. Drink me the second you wake up. You wake up dehydrated, slow, confused, and then blame life instead of yourself. Unplug me when you're not using me. I'm still stealing electricity while you sleep, wasting money for nothing. Stop

avatar Jeremy Jordan
I KNOW THEY DIDN'T ASK FOR IT BUT, JUST TO BE SURE, I SENT A STOOL SAMPLE WITH MY TAX RETURN

I KNOW THEY DIDN'T ASK FOR IT BUT, JUST TO BE SURE, I SENT A STOOL SAMPLE WITH MY TAX RETURN

avatar Patricia Lee
The innocent won’t understand what problem is being solved

The innocent won’t understand what problem is being solved

avatar Charlie Chocolate

cherry and sweet. Oh yeah? I put my pants on one leg at a time. So my pants are 22 different flavors. I've got great pants. I've got watermelon pants. And I wear them in my head. It takes work to look this good. But other than that, I'm completely normal.

avatar Patricia Lee
I may be headed to Hell for this one

I may be headed to Hell for this one

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