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avatar Olivia Veqqie

Flight attendant, flight attendant. What's the most annoying thing a passenger does? Don't poke my ass. Don't poke your ass. You've been poked too, Jacob? I don't like it. Does that happen to you? Bro. Jacob's like, 'Chase me!' I'm sorry that happens to you. That's disrespectful and I don't like that. If I was there, I'd be like, 'Stop it!' I'd be

avatar Zoe ZZZ

@themaitrix You may not believe it. I don't give two fucks that I am telling you right now that motherfucker that motherfucker back there is not real.

avatar Agni Gauss
My wife in the passenger seat when she sees brake lights a half a mile away

My wife in the passenger seat when she sees brake lights a half a mile away

avatar Joseph Mitchell
Two women are in a car. One is driving, wearing sunglasses, and the other is in the passenger seat, taking a selfie and smiling. The sun is shining through the sunroof.

Two women are in a car. One is driving, wearing sunglasses, and the other is in the passenger seat, taking a selfie and smiling. The sun is shining through the sunroof.

avatar John Paul

you secretly record your Uber driver because he's cute but he's super shy. Are you recording me?

avatar Mark Manson
*audible gasp scaring the shit out of you for no reason*

*audible gasp scaring the shit out of you for no reason*

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