Asking my toddler to describe her dad who's 'missing'. I lost your dad. You lost your dad? No, your dad. I'm dad? No. I lost your dad. Daddy is lost. Everleigh, what is that? Where Jesus died on the cross. It's a T. POV: When your toddler is too good at listening. Juliet, knock it off! *Knock* *Knock* That's not what I meant. BASKETBALL! Ooo, is th
Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you the black man who held out in the Lindsay Clancy trial. Followers, there was a black man on the juror. That was the one that stood between the movement. And that black man was me. Yep. Yep. I have to confess. Listen, I'll send you my address later. I'll send you my phone number. And feel free to inbox me all y
SHELDON & PENNY'S FUNNIEST BLOOPERS EVER. My name is stupid Valerie Mossbocker, head cheerleader. Big old fat fat fat fat fat. If you can't get me to stop eating your food, what makes you think you can get me to stop eating your Wi-Fi? Oh, I don't know. I forgot. You know, honey, did you ever consider making friends by being, I don't know, Oh, I do
I'VE BEEN WATCHING THIS ON A LOOP FOR 10 MINUTES STRAIGHT. Run, Yuli, run, run, run, run! Run, the crocodile will catch you, run! Fire that private tire!
DON'T TELL COMEDY DR. SQUATCH MY DAD IS MR. T. MOHAWK, MOST PEOPLE THINK I'M LYING WHEN I SAY THAT, BUT I'M LIKE, WHY WOULD I PICK HIM? LIKE, WHO THE FUCK IS LYING ABOUT MR. T, RIGHT? AND I GREW UP IN THE 80S AND 90S, SO EITHER EVERYONE BELIEVED ME OR NO ONE BELIEVED ME. LIKE, THERE WAS NO IN BETWEEN. I GREW UP IN A VERY WEALTHY NEIGHBORHOOD, SO EV
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