Oh, I need to run by the ATM. So I pulled in there, I accessed my account. I didn't have very much money in there, but what I had was mine. I got to looking right in front of me, and there's a character with a dog collar on. I looked to my left over there, and there was the ugliest fellow I'd ever seen in my life. Ugly! U-G-L-Y. He didn't have no a
I love a sketchy friend in the group. Look, I'm that guy that everybody calls on when they need sketchy shit done, right? So like, you need to find a place to get your car inspected because it won't pass, I got you. You locked your keys in your office and you want me to come do hood rat shit and break in for you? I got you. So tell me why the other
DON'T TELL COMEDY DR. SQUATCH MY DAD IS MR. T. MOHAWK, MOST PEOPLE THINK I'M LYING WHEN I SAY THAT, BUT I'M LIKE, WHY WOULD I PICK HIM? LIKE, WHO THE FUCK IS LYING ABOUT MR. T, RIGHT? AND I GREW UP IN THE 80S AND 90S, SO EITHER EVERYONE BELIEVED ME OR NO ONE BELIEVED ME. LIKE, THERE WAS NO IN BETWEEN. I GREW UP IN A VERY WEALTHY NEIGHBORHOOD, SO EV
Does your spouse and or significant other just not trust you in situations where you're the most competent person in the room just because you fuck them? You reading my mind or something Nicholas? What's going on? Yeah, no, absolutely. Hannah started playing pickleball a ton. Wait, pause. Let me close the door real quick. Everyone hide. Oh, I don't
I was checking into a hotel in Ottawa. I saw a lady behind the counter, her name was Linda. I was like, "Hey Linda, how you doing? Do you have any recommendations on things you think I should do while I'm in town? I'm gonna be here for about a week?" And she's like, "No, I don't have any recommendations because I just moved here." I was like, "No w
How much would it cost me to take you back to my room for the rest of the evening? And she said, well, I, how much do you think I'm worth? Being 18, I had no idea how much she was worth. I offered $300. And she said that's a little bit too low. So I said, okay, well, what if I doubled it and made it 600? And she said, well, that's a little more lik
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