Two Canadians die and end up in hell. Satan decides to pay them a visit. So he walks into their room and sees them talking and laughing. Confused, he asks them why they're happy. They tell him, 'Well, we're so sick of the cold where we're from, and this place is nice and toasty.' Satan, annoyed, storms away and goes to hell's boiler room, where he
Jethro Tull. @CHICOFFREITAS. Thick as a brick. February 1977. Really don't mind if you sit this one out. My words have been a whisper, your deafness a shout. I may make you feel better, but I can't make you think. Your sperm's in the gutter, your love's in the sink. So you ride yourselves over the fields and you make all your rambles and your wise
There are certain people walking this earth that you seriously need to leave the fuck alone. They don't bother anybody. They don't go around asking people for shit. All they ever wanted was real love, respect, and the same energy they give to others. So leave them the fuck alone. If someone has been genuinely good to you, don't invent some fucked u
The time Mr. Rogers made everyone cry at the Emmys. Would you just take along with me 10 seconds to think of the people who have helped you become who you are. Those who have cared about you and wanted what was best for you in life. 10 seconds of silence. I'll watch the time. Whomever you've been thinking about, how pleased they must be to know the
PROOF THAT PEOPLE HAVE ALWAYS KNOWN WHAT DEMOCRATS REALLY ARE. This is Mr. Montgomery. I met him a few weeks ago in New York. Oh, hi. You live here? Yes. Well, maybe you know what a zombie is. When a person dies and is buried, it seems that certain voodoo priests who have the power to bring him back to life. Horrible. It's worse than horrible becau
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