TODAY ON A DRIVE, I DECIDED TO GO VISIT MY CHILDHOOD HOME. I ASKED THE PEOPLE LIVING THERE IF I COULD COME INSIDE BECAUSE I WAS FEELING NOSTALGIC, BUT THEY REFUSED AND SLAMMED THE DOOR IN MY FACE. MY PARENTS ARE THE WORST.
A MAN WALKS INTO AN ENCHANTED FOREST AND TRIES TO CUT DOWN A TALKING TREE. "YOU CAN'T CUT ME DOWN," THE TREE EXCLAIMS, "I'M A TALKING TREE!" THE MAN RESPONDS, "YOU MAY BE A TALKING TREE, BUT YOU WILL DIALOGUE."
NEWS: Trump says he decided to go to war after talking to Jared, Steve, Pete and Marco. Notice there isn't one military commander on that list. Last year he purged the armed forces of people with the highest military expertise and ability. Now he has launched a major war against Iran in the absence of the most serious military consultation. It's ha
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